Am I a Good – or Good Enough – Parent?

January 2007

The start of a new year is a great time to think about what’s working for your family and what you might like to change.  This month, Nurse Rona Renner, host of the radio show Childhood Matters and the parenting expert for the Bay Area Discovery Museum, discusses ways to become more confident about your parenting abilities.

Q. Being a parent is a lot harder than I expected. Any advice to make life easier in 2007? 

A. Being a parent is a lot harder than any of us expect. But the good news is that most parents do a much better job than they think they do. 

Rather than dwelling on the times you’ve lost your patience, or yelled, or given your kids fast food – yes, we’ve all done it – take a moment and reflect on your positive parenting qualities for a change. 

Perhaps you’re a good cook who makes sure your children don’t drink soda or eat lots of sugary snacks. Or you read to your child every night before bedtime,   or simply make sure to stop whatever you’re doing to comfort your kids when they get hurt or feel sad. And don’t forget to add having a “good sense of humor” to your list.

Then write down what’s hard for you. Maybe it’s juggling a busy life style, or dealing with your child’s high energy. Look at your list and highlight one thing that you’d like to work on. Talk to your spouse, partner or a friend, and brainstorm strategies that can help. Even something as simple as picking out school clothes in advance or talking about expectations before an outing can make a big difference.

Feeling overwhelmed and alone can make life as a parent seem even more difficult. Reach out to other moms and dads, and have a good laugh about the ways that you – and the rest of us – aren’t perfect. In my book, as long as you enjoy your kids, spend time together and learn from your mistakes, chances are you’re a good enough parent!

Rona Renner, RN, is host of the weekly radio show Childhood Matters, which airs every Sunday from 9-10 AM on 98.1 KISS-FM.  Do you have a question about parenting? Email asknurserona(at)badm.org.